What’s involved in dealing with obstacles and setbacks as you work towards your goals? Well, this episode is all about how to overcome challenges so you can keep working towards changing your life. So, welcome to Episode 11 of the Change Your Life! podcast… your practical guide to creating a better life for yourself.
Episode Transcript
When it comes to making changes in your life, there’s something we need to talk about: dealing with the challenges and setbacks we often face along the way. But what if, instead of being weighed down by these struggles, you could learn to use them as powerful forces to propel you forward? In today’s episode, we’re going to explore how to turn the pain of setbacks into the fuel that drives your success, transforming challenges from stumbling blocks into stepping stones.
If you’re ready to learn how to reclaim your power in the face of adversity, then grab a seat and let’s talk about how to Change Your Life!
Hello and welcome to Episode 11 of the Change Your Life! podcast… your practical guide to creating a better life for yourself!
I’m Jeremy Godwin, I’m a writer, coach, and mental health counsellor, and I talk to clients about this type of stuff for a living (plus you might also be familiar with my other podcast, Let’s Talk About Mental Health, where I teach people how to improve their wellbeing each week). In this special 12-part series I’m sharing all the practical advice I possibly can about how to change your life for the better, based on quality research as well as all the stuff I’ve been learning along the way over the past few years where I’ve been making a lot of changes in my own life.
Last week I talked about how to create an action plan that works, and so today (in the second last episode of this podcast) I want to explore how to deal with the inevitable challenges and obstacles that come our way from time to time, so you can stay focused on changing your life in spite of all the setbacks, shitstorms and shenanigans!
So, let’s start by talking about…
What are obstacles and setbacks?
When we talk about challenges, obstacles, and setbacks in the context of your personal growth and changing your life, it’s about the inevitable ‘bumps in the road’ and difficulties that often come with striving for something better; not to mention the random things that happen in our lives, and in the wider world, that can throw us off-course or demand our attention. These are the moments that test your resolve and your patience, and sometimes even your belief in yourself. Broadly speaking, they’re the difficulties that arise when you step out of your comfort zone and into the unknown… but, of course, the unknown is where growth happens and so it’s necessary for you to take a few risks (hopefully calculated risks!) if you’re going to have any hope of changing your life for the better!
Challenges are those tough situations or problems that require you to stretch your capabilities; to push beyond your comfort zone and to really focus on doing what needs to be done (within reason!) in order to move forward. They’re the hurdles that demand a bit more from you — whether that’s in terms of your skills, your mindset, your time, your emotional strength, etc. For example, if you’re trying to build a new habit like regular exercise, then the challenge might be finding the motivation to consistently get up early or to push through the initial discomfort and resistance. Here’s the thing: challenges are opportunities in disguise, because they force us to grow and they help us to become more than we were before.
Obstacles, on the other hand, are the barriers that stand in your way and can block your progress. These might be external factors, like financial difficulties, time constraints, unsupportive environments, etc. Or they could be internal factors, like self-doubt, fear, limiting beliefs, and more. Obstacles are the things that make your path towards changing your life feel longer and much more complicated than you might have anticipated. But they also offer you a chance to develop a greater level of resilience, as well as the opportunity to tap into your creativity, as you figure out ways to navigate around or over them.
Setbacks are those moments when it feels like you’ve been knocked off course, often when things don’t go as planned. These are the unexpected events or failures that can make you feel like you’re moving backwards instead of forwards. Maybe you’ve been working towards a promotion, and despite all your efforts, someone else gets the job. That’s a setback — a moment where it can feel like the universe is conspiring against you. But setbacks are also a natural part of any journey towards change. They remind you that progress isn’t always linear and that, sometimes, we need to reassess and adapt our approach.
Now, in a practical context, these concepts take on a very real and often personal meaning. When you’re working to change your life — whether that’s improving your mental health, changing careers, fostering better relationships, or whatever it is that you’re working on — challenges, obstacles, and setbacks can sometimes feel overwhelming. They might show up as resistance from other people who don’t understand your goals, or they could manifest as the discomfort of breaking long-held habits. They might be the financial strain that comes with investing in your education, or the self-doubt that creeps in when progress is a lot slower than you might have hoped.
Practically speaking, challenges push you to develop new skills or refine existing ones. For example, if you’re trying to manage stress better then a challenge might be learning how to meditate or finding the time to practice mindfulness in a busy schedule. It’s something that requires effort and persistence, but it’s also something that, once overcome, leaves you stronger and more capable.
Obstacles might be more tangible or situational. If you’re trying to save money but then you suddenly face unexpected expenses, that’s an obstacle. Or if you’re committed to a healthier lifestyle but have a busy work schedule, then finding the time to cook nutritious meals could be an obstacle. These are the types of things that require problem-solving and sometimes creative thinking to overcome. They test your commitment, and they force you to be resourceful.
Setbacks, on the other hand, can feel more emotional. They’re the times when you might question whether it’s all worth it. But, in a practical sense, setbacks are opportunities to pause, reflect, and perhaps change your strategy. There’s no doubt that they can be frustrating, without question, but they do also offer valuable lessons… if you’re willing to look for them. For example, if a particular approach to your goal isn’t working then a setback might be the nudge you need to try something different or to seek help from other people who’ve dealt with what you’re dealing with.
So, in essence, challenges, obstacles, and setbacks are part and parcel of any journey of change. They’re the tests that determine how badly you want something and how far you’re willing to go to achieve it. While they can be daunting, they also provide the necessary friction that helps us grow. And the good news? With the right mindset — combined with time, effort, and perseverance — they’re all surmountable; you can absolutely find a way around pretty-much anything, although it may not end up looking or feeling like what you had originally anticipated (and I’ll come back to that in a bit).
Now let’s talk about…
Why it’s important to deal with setbacks and challenges head-on
And really, to put it as plainly as I possibly can, it’s important because your problems are very unlikely to magically fix themselves… so if you want to achieve your goals then you need to take the wheel and guide the ship towards where you want to go!
Addressing obstacles, challenges, and setbacks head-on is crucial because they’re inevitable parts of any significant undertaking or life change. Ignoring them, or trying to avoid them, doesn’t make them disappear; instead, that often allows them to grow into bigger problems that can even potentially derail your progress entirely. Confronting difficulties directly is essential for overcoming them so you can continue to move in the direction of your goals, and it will also help with your personal growth and sense of resilience.
In general terms, dealing with these types of difficulties helps to build character and can strengthen your ability to handle future difficulties. I mean, sure, it’d be nice if you didn’t have to go through the ups and downs like this, but I think you know as well as I do that life is full of uncertainties, and so the ability to face problems head-on equips you with the skills and confidence needed to navigate uncertainties in an effective way. When you tackle challenges as they arise you develop resilience, and it’s an invaluable quality that helps you bounce back from adversity. Resilience is like a muscle: the more you exercise it, the stronger it becomes. That means that, over time, the challenges that once seemed overwhelming become a lot more manageable… and you’ll be better prepared to handle whatever life throws your way.
Addressing obstacles and setbacks as they happen also prevents them from accumulating and becoming too big and overwhelming. When problems are left unaddressed they can grow and compound, creating a snowball effect that makes it harder and harder to regain a sense of control. By dealing with issues quickly, and while they’re still manageable, you’re able to maintain your momentum and keep moving forward towards your goals. It’s also worth noting that facing challenges can lead to valuable learning experiences, because each obstacle you overcome teaches you something new — whether it’s about yourself, the situation, or the world around you. These lessons are essential for your personal growth and development, because they can provide you with insights that can guide your future actions and decisions. Sure, it’d be nice if we didn’t have to learn the lesson, and we could just go to the outcome, but that’s not really how life works; things very rarely just happen the way we hope they will without at least a bit of effort on our part.
Now, when it comes to achieving your goals and creating the changes you’re aiming for in your life, confronting issues becomes even more critical. Every goal worth pursuing comes with its share of difficulties. Whether you’re working towards better mental health, advancing in your career, or improving your relationships, you’ll inevitably encounter resistance in some form. If you shy away from these difficulties, you’re effectively giving up on your goals. Change requires effort, and that effort often involves pushing through the tough times.
Dealing with challenges head-on keeps you aligned with your goals. When you set out to make changes in your life, I’m going to guess that you’re doing so with a vision of a better future. This vision is your driving force, and every obstacle you overcome brings you one step closer to it. By addressing challenges as they arise, you maintain your focus and continue to move towards your desired outcome, rather than getting sidetracked or discouraged.
Addressing setbacks is also necessary because it allows for course correction. Not every plan will go smoothly, and setbacks often indicate that something isn’t working as intended so you need to make adjustments. By confronting setbacks, you give yourself the opportunity to reassess your approach and make necessary changes to your action plan. This type of flexibility helps you achieve long-term success, because it ensures that you remain adaptable and responsive to changing circumstances.
So, really, the main piece here is this: you can either let problems and setbacks get the best of you, and allow yourself to become overwhelmed by them or to feel stuck, or you can take the reins and work through them so you can find a solution that allows you to keep moving forward in the direction of your goals. Your mindset plays a huge role in how you proceed; like I said back in Episode 3 (about mindset), how you view things is your choice… and it’s the choices you make that will determine how you work through challenges along the way. You can either become fixated on the problem or you can turn your attention to finding solutions… either way, what you focus on is what you focus on.
If you want to change your life then you have to change your life, and that can be really difficult; when you face your difficulties head-on, and focus on finding practical solutions, you empower yourself to keep on moving forward… no matter how challenging the journey may be.
So, how do you do all of that? Well that’s a great question that I’m about to answer, but first let’s take a quick break to hear from the brands that help me create this show each week.
AD BREAK [does not play on Premium]
And welcome back! Now let’s talk about…
How to deal with challenges and setbacks (and overcome them!)
Alright, so my first suggestion is to acknowledge and process your emotions — so, when you’re faced with a setback, obstacle, or challenge, it’s completely natural to have an emotional reaction, whether that’s frustration, disappointment, or even fear. Managing your initial emotional response is crucial because it helps you to approach the situation with a clear and focused mind; when you acknowledge and process your emotions, you prevent them from clouding your judgement or leading to impulsive decisions. Give yourself permission to feel whatever emotions arise without judgement. Take a moment to pause and simply notice how you’re feeling. You might find it helpful to name the emotion — for example, saying to yourself, “I’m feeling really frustrated right now,” can bring a sense of clarity and it can help you to own the emotion (rather than allowing it to distract or control you). Once you’ve acknowledged what you’re feeling, take some time to process it in a healthy way, whether that’s through deep breathing, journaling, or talking it out with someone you trust. For example, if you’ve just encountered an unexpected setback at work, instead of reacting immediately choose to take a few minutes to step away from the situation. Breathe deeply, let the initial wave of emotion pass, and then return to the problem with a calmer and more rational mindset. This approach ensures that your emotional responses don’t derail your progress, and it allows you to tackle the challenge with a much clearer head. OK, next…
Focus on finding solutions — when you’re faced with challenges, it’s easy to become consumed by the problem itself rather than focusing your energy on finding a solution. Prioritising problem-solving is essential because it shifts your mindset from feeling stuck to taking action, which helps you to feel more in control and to have a greater sense of agency over what’s happening (rather than feeling like a victim of your circumstances). You can do this by actively looking for solutions instead of dwelling on the difficulty. For example, if you’re faced with a challenging work project, instead of getting overwhelmed by the scope, break it down into smaller tasks and tackle each one systematically; if you’re not sure about how to do something, then incorporate an extra step focused on finding out how to do it. This type of mindset and approach helps you to be more proactive and it ensures that you’re always moving towards a resolution. Next…
Stay committed to your goals — also known as, “Don’t give up at the first sign of trouble (or even the third)!” Commitment is the backbone of any successful change, and it’s especially important when it comes to dealing with challenges because it keeps you focused on your end goal… even when obstacles arise. Reinforce your commitment by regularly revisiting your goals and reminding yourself why they matter to you. For example, if you’re tempted to give up on a difficult goal then take a moment to reflect on the benefits of achieving it and how it aligns with your values (as well as why you chose to start working on it in the first place). This keeps your motivation strong and helps you push through tough times. Next…
Break it down — which might sound like I’m vying for the title of ‘World’s Oldest MC’, but I’m actually referring to not trying to tackle everything all at once. When you’re faced with a large challenge, it can feel overwhelming… and that can make it hard to even know where to start. Breaking the challenge down into smaller and more manageable tasks helps because it makes the process less daunting, and allows you to focus on one step at a time. Do this by identifying the key components of the challenge and then create a step-by-step plan to tackle each part. For example, if you’re facing a financial obstacle then break it down into smaller tasks like reviewing your budget, cutting unnecessary expenses, exploring additional income streams, etc. This type of ‘one step at a time’ approach will help you make steady progress without feeling too overwhelmed. OK, next…
Focus on what you can control — it’s easy to get bogged down by things that are out of your control, which can make challenges seem even more overwhelming. Can you fix everything? No. So you can either stress about the things you can’t control, or focus your energy on the things you can control. Focusing on what you can control helps because it empowers you to take action where it matters most. Identify the aspects of the challenge that are within your control and direct your energy towards those. For example, if you’re facing a delay in a project due to external factors then focus on what you can do in the meantime — like refining your plan or preparing for the next steps. This keeps you proactive, and it reduces feelings of helplessness. Next…
Keep the bigger picture in mind — when you’re in the thick of a challenge, it can be easy to lose sight of why you’re doing what you’re doing; actively keeping the bigger picture in mind is important, because it reminds you of your long-term goals and the value of pushing through difficulties. You can do this by regularly revisiting your goals and the reasons behind them. For example, if you’re struggling with a tough period in your career, remind yourself of the ultimate aim, whether it’s career advancement, personal fulfilment, or financial stability. This perspective helps you stay motivated and committed, even when the going gets tough. Next…
Practice patience — so, as I’m sure you’re aware, patience plays a key role when you’re dealing with challenges because progress often takes time. Choosing to be patient helps because it allows you to manage your expectations, and it reduces frustration when things don’t move as quickly as you might like. You can practice patience by reminding yourself that change is a process, and that setbacks are a natural part of that process. For example, if you’re working towards a significant goal, like losing weight or learning a new skill, understand that results may not be immediate. Instead of rushing, focus on steady and consistent efforts and trust that your persistence will pay off in the long run. OK, next…
Set realistic expectations — one of the reasons challenges can feel overwhelming is because we often set unrealistic expectations for ourselves. Like I’ve discussed in previous episodes, setting realistic expectations ensures that your goals are achievable and reduces the pressure you place on yourself. You can do this by breaking down your larger goals into smaller and more manageable tasks and working through them one at a time, while also setting deadlines for yourself that are challenging but attainable. For instance, instead of expecting to master a new skill in a week, give yourself a reasonable timeframe and acknowledge that progress might be gradual… and that’s OK. This type of approach helps to greatly reduce stress, and it keeps you moving steadily forward. Next…
Reframe negative thoughts — so, when you’re faced with challenge, it can be a common reaction to fall into negative thinking patterns, like doubt or pessimism. Reframing these types of thoughts is crucial because it helps you maintain a more constructive outlook and prevents your negative emotions from taking over (since they tend to wreak havoc and make it harder to get yourself back on track and moving forward). Reframe negative thoughts by consciously challenging them and replacing them with more positive or realistic ones. For example, if you find yourself thinking, “I’ll never get through this,” then try shifting that to, “This is tough, but I’m capable of finding a way forward.” This shift in mindset makes it a lot easier to stay focused and motivated. Next…
Maintain a positive attitude — OK, so having a positive attitude doesn’t mean just ignoring the reality of challenges; instead, it’s about choosing to focus on the possibilities rather than the limitations… which completely changes how you perceive obstacles and react to them. When you maintain a positive outlook, you’re much more likely to find creative solutions and stay motivated. Practice gratitude, focus on what’s going well, and surround yourself with supportive people. For example, if you’re facing a setback then take a moment to reflect on the progress you’ve already made or the skills you’ve gained along the way. This helps you to stay encouraged and ready to tackle whatever comes next. And so that leads to my next tip…
Stay flexible and adaptable — flexibility is crucial when dealing with challenges, because not everything will go according to plan and you never know what may end up being thrown your way. Being adaptable allows you to respond to unexpected changes and setbacks without getting stuck. You can cultivate flexibility by keeping an open mind and being willing to adjust your plans as needed. If you encounter an obstacle then, instead of giving up, consider alternative approaches or solutions. For example, if your original plan isn’t working then brainstorm different ways to achieve your goal (or, better yet, revisit the list of possible options you created in Episode 9!). By staying flexible, you can maintain your momentum and continue moving forward… even when the path is far from simple and straightforward! OK, so my next tip is…
Embrace a growth mindset — which means choosing to see challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, instead of insurmountable obstacles. This shifts your focus from what you can’t do to what you can learn from the situation. When you encounter a setback, remind yourself that it’s a chance to develop new skills or refine your approach and consciously reframe your thoughts — ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” or “How can this make me stronger?” By viewing challenges as part of your learning journey, you’ll be better equipped to overcome them. Next…
Use setbacks as motivation — OK, so setbacks can be disheartening… but they can also be used as a source of fuel to push you forward by viewing them as opportunities to push harder, dig deeper, and ultimately become stronger. This helps to turn a negative experience into a driving force that pushes you to focus even more on achieving your goal. For example, if you didn’t achieve a goal on your first attempt then use that experience as motivation to try again with even more focus and effort. It’s also helpful to connect the challenge to your bigger ‘why’ — the reason you’re pursuing your goal in the first place. Remind yourself of the importance of your goal and how overcoming this obstacle will bring you closer to achieving it. By keeping your focus on the end result, challenges become less about the struggle and more about the progress you’re making — fuelling your determination to keep going. Next…
Take responsibility — which means shifting the focus from external factors to what you can do to improve the situation. Do this by acknowledging your role in the challenges you’re facing and committing to making positive changes. For example, if a project at work isn’t going as planned, instead of blaming external circumstances, take a step back and evaluate what you could do differently. By taking responsibility, you become proactive in finding solutions rather than waiting for things to change on their own or relying on others to do it for you. OK, next…
Seek out support — you don’t have to face challenges alone; seeking support from others can provide new perspectives, advice, and encouragement, and it can help you see solutions you might not have considered on your own (while also providing emotional support when you probably need it most!). Reach out to friends, family, or mentors who can offer guidance, or even just listen, and help you find the strength and insight to overcome your obstacles. Next…
Learn to let go — look, sometimes, despite your best efforts, a particular approach or goal just may not be achievable in the way you initially imagined. Learning to let go is crucial because it frees you from the frustration of trying to force something that isn’t working and it allows you to redirect your energy towards more viable paths. Recognise when it’s time to pivot or change course and accept that letting go doesn’t mean giving up — it means making a strategic (and smart!) decision to pursue a better alternative. For example, if a business venture isn’t delivering the expected results then consider adjusting your strategy or exploring a new direction. By letting go of what isn’t working, you open yourself up to new possibilities.
Summary & Conclusion
So, the main thing I’d like to leave you with today is this:
Challenges, obstacles, and setbacks are inevitable from time to time, especially when you’re focused on changing your life, and each one is an opportunity for growth and transformation. You have the strength within you to overcome whatever comes your way, so choose to focus on finding solutions and keep moving forward with determination and a positive mindset. Trust in your ability to triumph over adversity and keep your eyes on the horizon… because your journey is far from over, and the best is yet to come. You’ve got this!
So, by way of closing out, each week I like to share a quote that’s relevant to the subject; this one about challenges is by an unknown author, and it is: “Adversity is one of life’s greatest teachers.”
Alright… that’s it for this episode; next week, in the final episode of this show, I’ll be talking about what success looks and feels like when it comes to changing your life, along with the critical step you need to incorporate into your life to find genuine, long-lasting satisfaction. I hope you’ll join me for that episode!
If you found this episode helpful, please give it a like so other people can find it and leave me a note to tell me what you thought; if you’re on Spotify scroll down and leave a comment below, or you can let me know over on Instagram or Threads @itsjeremygodwin. Sign up to my mailing list for free at itsjeremygodwin.com to have episode transcripts and audio emailed to you each week, and support me on Patreon for early access to ad-free episodes of all of my podcasts; you’ll find all of those links in the episode description.
Thank you very much for joining me today! Have an absolutely fantastic day, night, whatever it is when you’re listening, and I’ll talk to you next time. Take care!
Change Your Life! is an independent program proudly produced by Reconnaissance Media. For more information, visit reconnaissancemedia.com
Jeremy Godwin 